There is no doubt that we have all had our moments, our trials n tribulations but there is no denying that there are special moments aren't meant to be forgotten, My 2009 engagement will always be remembered with the fondest of memories, In fact, after 8 months of disengagement, our memories are kept well entertained in my head. Honestly, i still have not gotten over it. I would always be grateful to Allah for what HE has given to me of which no doubt providing better relief and satisfaction in my soul.I don't think he will see or read this note...my self expression note...but deep in my heart, i will always love him.
I'm sorry for those who didn't know the whole truth that almost everyone blamed me for everything.Little they knew, I'd always stand for my believes....no matter what...Let the secret saved with me....I couldn't help but to feel a deep sense of sorrow, eight months have almost gone and the end of the relationship is finally in sight. Wether it's true or false, i heard rumours that he will be getting married next year.Wow!!!So fast.....how fast the time flies....it's not easy for me but I wish him all the best.i hope he will remember the times we've had both the good and the bad because they're the pleasant memories we've shared...(p/s after u've got married......erase all of them)...:(((
As for me, I'll keep myself busy with the stuffs that i favored and waiting for the MR RIGHT to show rite in front of my nose...heheheh (almost cried)...sob,sob,sob...MY NEXT YEAR RESOLUTION IS TO ERASE ALL OF HIS THOUGHTS IN MY MIND AND HOPEFULLY I'LL NEVER EVER MEET HIM AGAIN....CAUSE I'LL GET HURT......(FORGETTING SOMEONE U ONCE LOVED...WAS NOT AN EASY TASK...AT ALL)...SIGH,SIGH,SIGH......
"J: all de best to you......"
***friends-since 1993;
***FB-june 2009;
***Dating-August 2009;
***Engaged-22nd november 2009;
***Crisis-6th April 2010;
***Diengaged-1st May 2010;
***TRANSMISSION ENDSSSS*****
Thursday, December 9, 2010
part two-the gym.....2006 onwards....
Why did I like o hang out at the gym so much? be it alone or with frens, the gym was like my second home. I have a "wonderful family" there...huhuhu...seriously...Not many people understood my close relationships with the gym....tak perlu faham tetapi gym itulah yang telah memerikan pelbagai perubahan positif yang tidak dapat dibeli oleh sesiapa pun....definitely, i'm a happy person now....n ...then....
It;s not a fairy tale, not even an imagination.To begin with, after graduating frm Uitm/MMu/UPm as well as having several disasters in my relationships with my chinese bfs, i began to turn my interest to food...food,,,,n food...staying slim really did become harder year by year.to lose fewer pounds could seem welded to my frame.The fat tissue was all over my body not even lean muscle....I was horrible but i still didn't give a damn about it....let it be, let it be.........??????
As i aged, my body became less active and the body's basal metabolism rate slows a little each year. I shrunk -not from side to side, but from top to bottom.exercising became harder with age.sedar tak sedar aku overweight...."gemuk", "pendek", "petak", "ugly"...etc....i suffered from the insultations for many years but i'd always refer to my family and Allah for my spirituality strength....nevertheless....i was in a great depression.......sigh,sigh,sigh.....
My family is a very supportive family....i am blessed!They said the no.1 fat fighter was exercise.I still remember vividly when my weight struck 80kg!!!!The changes were a bit difficult for me.....
I began to workout ...the outdoor workout initially, by jogging at Bukit Jalil....The painful was hitting me...i hate it....sucks....I know by far being active here, obviously burned calories -200 or more an hour during brisk walking..but i couldn't stand no more.....i went back to my habit....eating non-stoppable!
Lizot, my elder sister, saw the growth of my passion to food, and she didn't like the scene afterall....she took me seriously....she was the one who introduced me to california fitness (now it's known as celebrity fitness).I was so reluctant to go but after the massive tour guide at the gym...for the first time, i have had made the right decision.I tried the most basic exercise ever like walking on the trademill briskly and continuously, swimming, riding a stationary bicycle, a body combat with selected music-i felt less stress to muscles and joints........wow!
The worst part was ...i went on a very serious dieting n exercising which immediately resulted in me, experiencing chest discomfort, dizziness,nausea as well as excessive breathlessness....i collapsed drastically...i should have started slowly....that was when i continued seeking for PT (personal trainer) for help......still....i was pretty damn bored!!!
Then, sometimes in the middle of November 2006.....i tried a hip hop beginner class, 1st ever conducted by michael....the minute i joined it....i was totally in lurve with hip hop...reminiscing my childhood days...heheh...that moment marked the beginning of my hip hop journey in that was to change my life....i took 3 months to be able to dance well...like a pro....kkakakakaka..(perasannya aku)....it took also a lot of passions n patients.....then i blossomed to salsa/latino/ hip hop jazz/pop dance n now i lurve so much zumba!....the weights lost in time...so....."break away, and fly across the ocean".....i FEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLL GUUUUUUUUUDDDD!
inspite of that, i met my GBBFF(gym best buddy/friend forever), firdaus....aka MJ....before getting to know this fella, i taught that he was serious n non-friendly and funny but i never imagined how friendly he was till i met and knew him better.i was the one who inititated the conversation...since then ...since 2006 up till now, we're nothing but two gud frens who like to gossip....hahahaha...our specialty.....n of course dance!he is a person who managed to enchant everyone he met with his charming sense of humour....therefore, he always had a good ear to listen... i would definitely turned to him in times of need- a potential psychiatrist in the making......he's a gud brother and a buddy at the gym....daus akaMJ, my fren...cheeers to our 4 yrs or friendships....awesome!
daus supported me of my long time crush on "atuk"...we're just main2...kakakak...because "atuk' is the best thing that ever happens kat gym....tak de subject lain ....kakakaka...
BUT...WHO IS "ATUK"??????????
It;s not a fairy tale, not even an imagination.To begin with, after graduating frm Uitm/MMu/UPm as well as having several disasters in my relationships with my chinese bfs, i began to turn my interest to food...food,,,,n food...staying slim really did become harder year by year.to lose fewer pounds could seem welded to my frame.The fat tissue was all over my body not even lean muscle....I was horrible but i still didn't give a damn about it....let it be, let it be.........??????
As i aged, my body became less active and the body's basal metabolism rate slows a little each year. I shrunk -not from side to side, but from top to bottom.exercising became harder with age.sedar tak sedar aku overweight...."gemuk", "pendek", "petak", "ugly"...etc....i suffered from the insultations for many years but i'd always refer to my family and Allah for my spirituality strength....nevertheless....i was in a great depression.......sigh,sigh,sigh.....
My family is a very supportive family....i am blessed!They said the no.1 fat fighter was exercise.I still remember vividly when my weight struck 80kg!!!!The changes were a bit difficult for me.....
I began to workout ...the outdoor workout initially, by jogging at Bukit Jalil....The painful was hitting me...i hate it....sucks....I know by far being active here, obviously burned calories -200 or more an hour during brisk walking..but i couldn't stand no more.....i went back to my habit....eating non-stoppable!
Lizot, my elder sister, saw the growth of my passion to food, and she didn't like the scene afterall....she took me seriously....she was the one who introduced me to california fitness (now it's known as celebrity fitness).I was so reluctant to go but after the massive tour guide at the gym...for the first time, i have had made the right decision.I tried the most basic exercise ever like walking on the trademill briskly and continuously, swimming, riding a stationary bicycle, a body combat with selected music-i felt less stress to muscles and joints........wow!
The worst part was ...i went on a very serious dieting n exercising which immediately resulted in me, experiencing chest discomfort, dizziness,nausea as well as excessive breathlessness....i collapsed drastically...i should have started slowly....that was when i continued seeking for PT (personal trainer) for help......still....i was pretty damn bored!!!
Then, sometimes in the middle of November 2006.....i tried a hip hop beginner class, 1st ever conducted by michael....the minute i joined it....i was totally in lurve with hip hop...reminiscing my childhood days...heheh...that moment marked the beginning of my hip hop journey in that was to change my life....i took 3 months to be able to dance well...like a pro....kkakakakaka..(perasannya aku)....it took also a lot of passions n patients.....then i blossomed to salsa/latino/ hip hop jazz/pop dance n now i lurve so much zumba!....the weights lost in time...so....."break away, and fly across the ocean".....i FEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLL GUUUUUUUUUDDDD!
inspite of that, i met my GBBFF(gym best buddy/friend forever), firdaus....aka MJ....before getting to know this fella, i taught that he was serious n non-friendly and funny but i never imagined how friendly he was till i met and knew him better.i was the one who inititated the conversation...since then ...since 2006 up till now, we're nothing but two gud frens who like to gossip....hahahaha...our specialty.....n of course dance!he is a person who managed to enchant everyone he met with his charming sense of humour....therefore, he always had a good ear to listen... i would definitely turned to him in times of need- a potential psychiatrist in the making......he's a gud brother and a buddy at the gym....daus akaMJ, my fren...cheeers to our 4 yrs or friendships....awesome!
daus supported me of my long time crush on "atuk"...we're just main2...kakakak...because "atuk' is the best thing that ever happens kat gym....tak de subject lain ....kakakaka...
BUT...WHO IS "ATUK"??????????
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
part one
"Apok!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!", i was startled at first.......i started to pinch myself.....am i dreaming or the world war 3 is right in front of my face..i was sweating...my head, my legs , in fact, all of my body parts went numb."Splash!".....ooopsss....something gets into my nostrils....then struck to my head, my chest,,,,,,arghh!!!!so painfullllll.....
Then i knew tht my mom was staring at me fiercely while the other hand is holding a big, fat, ugly pail of water......then she started to babble like thunderstorms.......i was totally stuck up in the middle.....then i started to remember...i was late....i jumped out from the bed...rushing to my nap sack, get my car key and turn on the engine n move faster ....to the gym...The last word i heard from my mom was..."u'll know wat ull get when u're coming back!"....Geee....mom...i was feeling guilty at first but no one could ever stops me frm going to my hip hop dance at the gym....my favourite gym.....HAHAHAHAHAHAH!
Then i knew tht my mom was staring at me fiercely while the other hand is holding a big, fat, ugly pail of water......then she started to babble like thunderstorms.......i was totally stuck up in the middle.....then i started to remember...i was late....i jumped out from the bed...rushing to my nap sack, get my car key and turn on the engine n move faster ....to the gym...The last word i heard from my mom was..."u'll know wat ull get when u're coming back!"....Geee....mom...i was feeling guilty at first but no one could ever stops me frm going to my hip hop dance at the gym....my favourite gym.....HAHAHAHAHAHAH!
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